Don't Mind the Mess

I have procrastinated this list for weeks. My reading is all out of its normal routine. Usually I start reading the next year’s galleys in late summer or early fall but this year I felt like I hadn’t caught up with 2018 so I kept reading those and then I put all of it on pause for a whole month while I went on a horror binge and then when I came back I had even more of 2018 to catch up on and long story short, eventually I just had to decide to make this list so that it actually came out IN 2018. I may get a straggler that I wish had been on the list, but that happens literally every year and it just can’t be helped.

This list is utterly subjective, it is about my personal experiences with these books. There are so many books that aren’t on it that I adored this year, but I look for a special extra something. I also look for staying power, how long do I continue to think about the book, talk about the book, recommend the book as time passes. The books at the top of my list may not necessarily be better than the ones that don’t make the list at all, it’s just that when I read it I had an experience and that elevates it into the realm of the memorable. But this year’s list is full of all kinds of books so I’m sure there’s something here for everyone. (The top of my list is a bit snooty, but most of it is pretty darn commercial.)

I also had a tricky time this year ranking the books on my list. My top 3 have been my top 3 for quite some time but I couldn’t decide which two to add to round it out to a top 5. And instead of a top 10 I ended up with 11, instead of 20 I have 19. Just gonna roll with it. After all, it isn’t like I’ve updated this blog in LITERALLY MONTHS. All links are Amazon affiliate links that help keep the blog running. (Yes, the blog still has expenses, shocking I know.)

My apologies. If you’d like to keep up with my reading more regularly, you can find me on Goodreads.

Without further ado, my weird listing of 18 beautiful books that made my year better.

My Absolute Favorites

Usually my top 5 is 5 novels, or 4 novels and 1 memoir. This year there is nary a novel in sight. Who even am I? What can I say, these are the books that I simply cannot get over, that I still think about on a daily basis, that said something urgent and brilliant to me. In alphabetical order by author.

How to Write an Autobiographical Novel by Alexander Chee. Yup, I am starting off my list with a book of essays (warning: it’s not even the only book of essays on here, it’s a crazy year). Okay, I admit, this book has me squarely in its sights. It is calling me out. It is targeting me personally. So yes, I do happen to be chipping slowly away at a work of fiction that somewhat resembles my own story. And that does color my experience. But these lists are always subjective and at least I’m owning it. The thing is, I have seen this book work its way through the writers I know and love and it has taken every single one of them on their own journey and we are all better for it. Chee is not only a writer so good it pains you to know you will never be this good, his essays are also overflowing with empathy so you can’t even be mad at him about it. For anyone it’s a beautiful collection of writing. For writers it’s practically required reading, especially if you, like me, will never have the time or money to get formal training. This book is a $15 MFA. Buy it, underline it, treasure it.

Florida by Lauren Groff. I have read three novels by Lauren Groff and each time I like her a little more, but each time I also wonder a little bit if maybe she’s just not for me. Maybe it’s just one of those things, like when you go on a date with a perfectly nice person but there’s no chemistry. Fates and Furies even made it to my Best of 2015 list, thanks to its smart structural feats, though it was in the 11-20 tier. I had no plans to read Florida. I didn’t think a story collection from Groff would be something I’d enjoy. I thought it would be a little too smart in that way I always feel like she is but I’m not. But clearly I was wrong because it is my favorite fiction of the entire year. I adored these stories. And I adored what the collection did as a whole. It was just what I like, where you can see the ways in which the stories overlap each other or rub up against each other, but each of them is its own world. I don’t know that I’ve ever done a story collection on audio before, but I did this time and I was just addicted to it. It has so much to say about women and the constant threats of menace and anxiety and this moment in time.

Heavy: An American Memoir by Kiese Laymon. Like the other two, this was such a clear “Best” that it wasn’t even a question. I have the deepest love and respect for a memoir that makes me rethink what a memoir can do and what it’s there for. (I suspect this is because I am a person who is fascinated by the narratives we create around our own lives.) And Heavy was one of those books. It’s written directly by Laymon to his mother, and much of the book addresses their complex relationship, full of hurt but also fierce love. And it considers how race impacted their world in both the biggest ways and the smallest, how his mother’s desire for him to be safe and whole led her to cause him mental and physical pain. But this isn’t just a book about family trauma, it’s about a lot more than that, including weight, body image, and addictions. It’s written in prose that seems so simple and straightforward but carries so much in it.

Definite Champions

Semiosis by Sue Burke. One of the backlist titles I particularly enjoyed this year was a book called Children of Time and I found myself desperately wanting to read something just like it when a smart mutual suggested this book. It was even better than I’d hoped, a book that checked all my boxes. It’s a science-fiction novel about a colony of idealists going off to a new planet with very specific plans for the kind of society they want to form. As you can guess, it doesn’t exactly go according to plan. Not only do you get all the human interplay and drama that I love, you also get lots of fun botany! (Good science-fiction can make any science fun, even plant science which I usually find to be a complete snooze fest. But alien plants are AMAZE.) It also jumps through a large section of time, letting you see both small changes within chapters and large ones between them. So satisfying and a book I wish more people would read.

Emergency Contact by Mary H. K. Choi. The only Young Adult book on my list this year, there’s usually one that sneaks in and I was surprised that it was this one but very pleased.  I loved so many things about this book. I loved Penny, who is not just “a prickly YA protagonist” in that way that they aren’t really all that prickly just kind of scowly, Penny is actually prickly and sulky and kind of hates everyone and I loved her. Yes, she wears all black and she has the specific bands she’s into blah blah blah, she has a very specific set of anxieties and you really get to see them in everything about her. There is a guy, because of course, and Penny connects with him over text. The book explores the very now-phenomenon of how you can get to know a person over text in a way that you can’t always replicate in real life. Sam, her love interest, may be kind of a manic pixie dream guy, but while he is clearly a good person he makes lots of terrible romantic decisions. I loved watching these two weirdos get to know each other.

Washington Black by Esi Edugyan. A historical adventure novel! Another surprise on my list, since historical novels and adventure novels are usually not so much my thing. But Edugyan pulls off a particularly impressive feat: she tells a story with a slave protagonist that tackles complex, modern issues on race. This book feels so modern while also letting you play around across several continents, including major plot points with octopi and dirigibles. A real stunner.

Freshwater by Akwaeke Emezi. Perhaps the most complex and interesting novel I read this year, Emezi’s autobiographical tale explores gender through the Igbo concept of the ogbanje, a trickster spirit. Emezi takes this and looks at it her own way, fusing gender identity, mental health, and myth to create her character of Ada, who is the central body but not the central character of the book. As she grows, the different selves within her struggle for power over her, and as she experiences trauma and pain, her selves allow her to cope and shift to get through it. It’s a fascinating story and I’m excited to see what’s next from Emezi.

A Place for Us by Fatima Farheen Mirza. I love stories about family and religion and the clashes the two together can cause, so this book was squarely in my wheelhouse. It also has multiple points of view, a structure that jumps through time, and has significant character shifts. This book was made for me in a lab, I swear. The drama here may be small, it may be just one family, but it feels epic, Shakespearean even. One Muslim family revolves around Amar, the only son, who is estranged from the rest of the family when we meet him at the beginning of the book. We trace the story backwards and forwards, to see where the rift came from and how it impacts all the characters in different ways. I love how Mirza loves all her characters, how she respects their beliefs or lack thereof, how tenderly she depicts them all. I cried so hard at the end of this book.

Circe by Madeline Miller. So many people got on board with this book that I succumbed to it solely through peer pressure. I don’t do a lot of fairy tale or myth retellings, I hadn’t read Miller’s previous book about Achilles. It seemed like it might be stuffy. But oh this book was great, even if your memory of Greek myths is very fuzzy, there’s a lot of joy here. (Although technically I think I love The Song of Achilles, which I read right after Circe, just a little bit more. It’s so gay and wonderful!) The feminist retelling is turning into its own genre, but Miller is so subtle and smart that it never feels like work, it’s just a hell of a pageturner.

There There by Tommy Orange. I spent many months desperately hoping that this book would be a Big Thing and I was so pleased when it actually was. If there was one work of literary fiction that got the most buzz this year, it was this one and rightly so. This book is a set of connected stories about the Native (he uses the word “Indian) community in Oakland. Some are deeply connected to their Indian identity, others barely at all. There is no one way to be Native in the modern world and Orange gives us a tapestry of lives and families. It took me a little while to really get moving in this world, but once I had the momentum I couldn’t stop.

Red Clocks by Leni Zumas. It was a big year for feminist dystopias but this was the one that really got me. It’s set in the very near future and follows several women after the US has outlawed abortion and IVF, giving full personhood to embryos. The best near-future books are ones where you see exactly how this world came to be and it feels eerily close to real life, and Zumas passes with flying colors. It’s both mesmerizing and terrifying. All the women in this book have lives centered around female reproduction in some way, and seeing everything from pregnancy to abortion to parenting in this world lets you see just how massive the consequences of the smallest restrictions on women’s reproductive freedom are. Also it’s just a riveting novel with impeccably drawn characters that I got totally addicted to and I’m a sucker for a vagina-cover.

Memorable and Worthwhile

Give Me Your Hand by Megan Abbott. Megan Abbott is the most reliable thriller writer out there, every new book is a joy. This one is one of her best. As always, it’s centered around women’s experiences, this time with two former best friends who end up in the same research lab.

Bad Blood: Secrets and Lies in a Silicon Valley Startup by John Carreyrou. The most unputdownable book of the year. The most bizarre and ridiculous stories of the year. I have some nitpicks with Carreyrou but I can’t deny that this book is so readable that it feels like it wasn’t even written, just piped directly into your brain.

All You Can Ever Know: A Memoir by Nicole Chung. A beautiful, moving memoir about transracial adoption that will speak to you deeply about family and identity whether or not you’re an adoptee.

The Witch Elm by Tana French. If you know me you know how much I love Tana French and her first standalone is the slowest of burns, but it sure burns. I listened to it obsessively while stuck inside during a hurricane and I couldn’t get enough of it.

Force of Nature by Jane Harper. One of the most enjoyable mysteries of the year, about a corporate retreat gone awry and I won’t give you anything else so you can read it cold.

This Will Be My Undoing: Living at the Intersection of Black, Female, and Feminist in (White) America by Morgan Jerkins. The second (!!) book of essays on this list, if you’re a white person in particular I think there’s a lot to get out of this book that doesn’t center your experience and isn’t written for you. Also if you assume books of essays are boring and dull, think again.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones. Discovering Tayari Jones this year was a real treat, she writes novels with complex relationships and characters who are never simple. I also highly recommend her previous novel, Silver Sparrow, which I think may be my favorite.

Sunburn by Laura Lippman. If James M. Cain was alive and a woman, this is the kind of book she would write. A twisty neo-noir thriller about a woman with a hidden past that leans into noir tropes and turns them on their head.

This list is already rather long or I’d throw in some honorable mentions because there were that many great books this year.

What were your favorite 2018 reads?

I have procrastinated my Seasonal Book post hard this year, my apologies. So instead of just being Winter books this is gonna be Winter/Spring combo and a double-long list. Hope the wait was worth it. All links are Amazon affiliate links, if you purchase through them I may get a small commission from the sale that helps the blog stay running. Books are listed from lightest to heaviest.

Dread Nation by Justina Ireland. The hook of this book is so solid that I probably don’t need to tell you much more than Civil War + Zombies. Before the end of the Civil War, a zombie uprising sets history on a different course. Instead of slavery there is now a caste system where society depends on Negro and Natives trained to kill zombies. Jane has the opportunity to move up in the world as a personal bodyguard for well-off white women, but the threat of zombies doesn’t seem quite as horrible as the threat of the white people she’s supposed to protect. There is so much meat to dive into here, it’s cultural-commentary-as-thrill-ride. Oh, and it’s a young adult novel you can give to your teenagers.

The Merry Spinster by Mallory (Daniel) Ortberg. If you were a reader of The Toast you don’t need me to tell you how delightful Ortberg’s writing is. But even as someone who isn’t always interested in twists on fairy tales, I was charmed and intrigued by these stories. This is more than just playing with tropes or taking a modern view on an old story, this book has a cheeky glint in its eye… and very sharp teeth.

Whiskey & Ribbons by Leesa Cross-Smith. Equal parts romance and grief, this book follows new mother Evi, her husband Eamon, and Eamon’s best friend Dalton who has been tasked with taking care of Evi after Eamon’s unexpected death. Moving back and forth through time, we get to see Evi’s love story with her husband and her attempts to find love again with Dalton. It’s a sad book but it’s also warm and full of real emotions and characters. A good pick for a book club or a beach.

Force of Nature by Jane Harper. This has been one of my go-to recommendations this year for readers who like crime novels. It’s such a big crowdpleasing, satisfying book, I have no doubt that pretty much all readers can enjoy it. I liked Harper’s first novel, The Dry, but I felt like she had some unused potential. Here she took it up a notch and I’m so pleased. (You don’t really need to read the first book, while the same detective is at the center of both books, his story isn’t the center.) Set in the Australian forest, a group of executives go on a retreat where they hike together through the woods. But when they return they’re missing one hiker. Great use of flashbacks, strong characters, such a solid book.

Jagannath by Karin Tidbeck. I encountered Tidbeck for the first time last year with her novel Amatka. She’s not a new writer, she’s been writing in Sweden for years and we’re just catching up. (She translated this book herself!) This story collection reminded me a lot of Kelly Link and Carmen Maria Machado but with a distinctly Scandinavian feel. They’re fantastic, surrealist, and surprising.

Sunburn by Laura Lippman. I have read a lot of Lippman’s crime novels but I think this may be the best one she’s written. This is old school noir with a feminist twist, with a twisty plot peppered with reveals and a heaping helping of character to add some real depth. There isn’t one puzzle here, but three. What happened, what happens now, and who are these characters really? A great pick for fans of the unlikable female protagonist (you know I’m one of them!), shades of Gone Girl without the plot twist whiplash.

The Pisces by Melissa Broder. This is one that I loved, but it’s going to be a divisive one. Not just because our protagonist Lucy is stuck in a self-destructive spiral that’s painful to watch, but I expect a lot of people won’t like the very frank, very detailed sex scenes. (Both of these are big pluses for me.) But we haven’t even gotten to the central story yet: of a woman who recovers from a bad breakup by falling for a merman. (I would say it’s a spoiler, but the cover gives it away.) This book is prickly and unique and stuck in its own head and it was a delight.

The Perfect Nanny by Leila Slimani. Another divisive book! I saw this on bookshelves for months but had to wait to get it on hold from the library. I was expecting a twisty thriller and that is not what I got. Instead this is a book about a woman who commits a truly horrible crime against the children she’s paid to care for (in the very first chapter, so don’t pick this up if you’re not up for it) that then wonders how such a thing could possibly happen. Instead of feeling ripped from the headlines, it feels meditative and thoughtful, taking all the tricky things about wealthy people hiring poor people to watch their children and not looking away.

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones. You’ve probably heard about this book already, but if you haven’t gotten it to it yet, I encourage you to move it to the front of the line. If you have a book club, this is such a perfect choice: not too long, a quick read, full of interesting characters, and complex emotional issues you can pick apart for hours. I highly encourage avoiding even the most basic synopsis on this one, even the jacket copy spoils some of the major plot elements that are best approached cold. Just take my word for it on this one. And if you won’t take mine, take Oprah’s.

This Will Be My Undoing: Living at the Intersection of Black, Female, and Feminist in (White) America by Morgan Jerkins. I don’t often read books of essays but I’m starting to get into them more when they’re by authors I already enjoy. I’ve read a few of Jerkins’ essays before this book and I was intrigued. In the collection, Jerkins shows a willingness to interrogate herself and her experiences that I rarely see in writers of personal essays and memoir. What was most noteworthy to me about this book is its efforts to center black women as its audience. As a white reader I’m used to being the default reader and it’s refreshing to go outside of that experience and understand Morgan and her point of view as a black woman better.

Speak No Evil by Uzodinma Iweala. Iweala rose to fame as the author of Beasts of No Nation and he goes in a very different direction with his new novel. Niru is a star student and athlete in his senior year of high school near DC, the son of successful Nigerian immigrants. When Niru realizes he’s gay, he knows his very religious parents will reject him and he’s desperate to keep his sexual orientation a secret until he can get away to college. His secret will become bigger than Niru could have possibly anticipated. We still don’t have many novels about queer characters, and most of the ones we have are about cis gay white men, so stories like this are still vitally important.

How to Write an Autobiographical Novel by Alexander Chee. If you, like me, actually are writing a semi-autobiographical novel, then this is a run-do-not-walk situation. If you’re any kind of a writer, especially one who writes personal essays, then same. In these essays, Chee explores the writing of his own autobiographical novel Edinburgh, his training in writing, and pushes his own limits of identity (in particular with respect to family, race, and gender). It is the kind of writing that makes you kind of hate the writer for being this good. (No really, how is it allowed?)

Freshwater by Akwaeke Emezi. This is one of the most exciting debuts of the year, hands down. Emezi uses Igbo mythology and religious traditions to bring a new lens to existing in the modern world. The protagonist, Ada, is an ogbanje, a person with several selves/spirits in their body. But to me, Emezi didn’t feel like she was creating magical realism, instead it felt very literal. She is able to use these several selves to understand how people react to trauma, how we protect parts of ourselves, and how we build new selves. It’s challenging and utterly singular.

Girls Burn Brighter by Shobha Rao. This is at the very bottom of the darkness scale, and please believe me when I say that this book is harrowing. It is not for the weak hearted. But it has many rewards for the reader who is willing to get to the end. Poornima and Savitha meet as girls in India and instantly become connected in the kind of way that is more than friendship, something more akin to romantic love. They are soulmates. But in the strict system they live in, they don’t have power over their destinies. When they are separated, Poornima leaves everything behind on a years-long journey to find her friend.

What are your favorite books of 2018 so far?

It was kind of a weird reading year for me. Usually by now my Best Of list has over 20 books on it and I have to pick and choose what I include. At first I only had 15 Best picks and 2 honorable mentions. But even though I spend basically all year marinating on the list, a few books called out to me all day and I realized that they should really be on this list and I sat down and redid just about everything below 10. 1-10 gets cemented pretty clearly in my brain but below that I was leaving out some great books. So here is my longer, better list.

Presented below in alphabetical order by title.

1-5

Exit West by Mohsin Hamid. A delicate and sure modern, surreal fable of immigration and the search for home.

Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body by Roxane Gay. One of the most affecting memoirs I’ve ever read, it’ll change the way you look at the world. Gay wants to show us what it is like to exist today as a fat woman.

Ill Will by Dan Chaon. An unsettling thriller that examines the perils of masculinity and obsession, with a side of Satanic Panic from the 80’s for extra fun.

A Kind of Freedom by Margaret Wilkerson Sexton. This is one of the big below-the-radar books this year that I want to tell everyone about. I almost missed it myself. A gripping story of optimism, class mobility, and loss through three generations of a New Orleans family.

Sing, Unburied Sing by Jesmyn Ward. Technically my #1 for this year, it was a pretty clear choice for me. This book is a mashup of The Odyssey and Toni Morrison that’s haunting and complex.

6-10

Amatka by Karin Tidbeck. Scandinavian bleakness meets surreal speculative fiction. This was my first novel by Tidbeck and it was inventive in a way I found incredibly exciting. I definitely need to read more of her.

The Fact of a Body: A Murder and a Memoir by Alexandria Marzano-Lesnevich. Thanks to the publicist who sent me a hand-written card telling me exactly why I should read this book. I usually avoid true crime, but this one is affecting and heartwrenching.

The Hole by Hye-Young Pyun. My only real regret this year is not re-reading this sly, smart horror novel from Korea. It reminded me of Shirley Jackson in the way it crept up on me. Another under-the-radar read I recommend you track down.

Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie. Muslim, politics, and terrorism collide in this novel, which made me a little hesitant to read it, but it works so well. This isn’t a hot button issue thriller or a lofty theoretical analysis, but a story that’s rooted in everyday life and families.

White Tears by Hari Kunzru. A trip of a horror novel about hipsters, racism, appropriation, and music. This was one of the most exciting and bizarre books I read this year and that’s a huge compliment.

11-15

Chemistry by Weike Wang. This is one of those books that has spent months living in my head and growing there. At first it felt like it was keeping me at a distance, but eventually I got so close to the failed grad student at its center that I don’t think I’ll ever quite lose her.

Difficult Women by Roxane Gay. A powerful and affecting story collection that showcases Gay’s agility and her uncanny knack of making you feel seen and understood. I saw real experiences here I have never seen in a book before.

Marlena by Julie Buntin. If you enjoy books about obsessive teenage female friendships, this is one of the best ones I’ve read. But beware, the chills of the small town in Michigan where it’s set may get into your bones.

No One Can Pronounce My Name by Rakesh Satyal. This book makes me smile whenever I think of it. While it certainly belongs in the larger category of immigrant stories, these are the stories of the immigrants who don’t fit into their communities and how they find their identity.

The Refugees by Viet Thanh Nguyen. A moving and affecting story collection that’s a strong follow-up to Nguyen’s debut, The Sympathizer, one of my favorite books of 2016.

16-20

Everything Belongs to Us by Yoojin Grace Wuertz. How class affects the friendship of a group of college students. Set in the social and political upheaval of 1970’s South Korea.

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas. The big YA book of the year is also worth the buzz. I was skeptical after hearing all the accolades but it measures up. It’s a book teens (and plenty of adults) should read.

Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds. A one-sitting YA novel written in verse about family, poverty, and cycles of violence that never feels preachy and packs a big punch.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid. A last minute addition thanks to a few late recommendations. A bubble bath of a book about old Hollywood that’s an excellent treat yourself read.

The Wanderers by Meg Howrey. The astronauts for the first mission to Mars embark on a 17-month training mission. It’s a novel about scientists, something I love, and a novel about what it’s like to be in a family with someone who’s always willing to leave you behind for Outer Space.

Honorable Mentions

Borne by Jeff Vandermeer.

Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado.

Human Acts by Han Kang.

Little & Lion by Brandy Colbert.

Pachinko by Min Jin Lee.

I have spent a lot of the year feeling like I didn’t have as many best books as usual, but when I made this list I realized that there have been books I left off that may not have hit me immediately upon reading them, but that snuck up on me and ended up getting lodged firmly in my brain. So it was better than I thought.

I meant to do a whole re-reading project this year but only made it a few books in. It’s hard for me to do anything prolonged. (Which may be why the 5th Patrick Melrose book has been sitting on my bed, untouched, for a few weeks.) But the first book I re-read was easily one of my best reading experiences this year. It was the new audio version of The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao, a book I hadn’t read since it came out. I was worried the audio wouldn’t work because it’s such a dense book, turns out it’s better on audio, you finally get to feel the rhythm in the prose. My other biggest backlist standout was also audio (in fact, all of the backlist titles I’m mentioning here were audiobooks), True Grit by Charles Portis, which is a nearly perfect book with my new favorite first person narrator. I also caught up on a couple recent hits that I thought I would like but that it took me a while to get to: The Sun Is Also a Star by Nicola Yoon, which is one of the most lovely and romantic YA novels I’ve ever read, and The Argonauts by Maggie Nelson, which made me concentrate pretty hard, but also made me think a lot about art and gender and parenthood.

There were easily 20 more new releases this year I could recommend without reservation. Little Fires Everywhere! This Is Just My Face! The Birdwatcher! And I wasn’t great at keeping up with releases this year, but you can always follow me on Goodreads to stay up to date on what I’m reading.

How did your year in reading go?