It’s not unusual for there to be flurries of activity around something in the blogging world. Right now there’s a lot of talk about quitting and the pressure of blogging.
I respect where those people are coming from, but it’s only reminded me of something that I realized a long time ago: I don’t feel it the same way a lot of other bloggers do.
For me blogging is only a choice in that it’s the fastest end possible. But it IS an end, it’s not a means. I’m not using blogging to get somewhere or be someone. Blogging itself is what I want, it is where I want to go, it is who I want to be.
I have been able to use my blogging to make other things happen in my life, I’ve tried to be savvy and leverage it when I can, but that was never the goal. And it has never been more than a perk.
It is possible that someday I’ll pull post less or differently. But that’s life. That’s things changing.
I do have that dream that I really will get the time to write that novel and that my blog will become my secondary form of expression rather than the primary one.
But I don’t see a future where the blog stops. I don’t see me quitting.
I’ve been doing this for a long time. Two weeks ago marked my 14th blog anniversary. 14 years ago I wrote my first blog post on my old site. I wrote that post as a freshly minted college graduate, just 21 years old. I’ve been blogging my entire adult life.
I went through one big change, moving from that old site to this new one. I had to find a different way for my blog to work. I had to fit it into a different kind of life. But it didn’t die. And I only feel more strongly about it as time passes.
Those pressures? I don’t feel them. Lately I’m posting around once a week and I’m okay with that. I’m still experimenting and trying things. The blog continues to evolve, but I feel like “evolve” is the correct word because it’s moving forward and becoming something better.
I post and I feel better. I post and I feel centered. I post and I feel like I’ve spent some time with myself.
I forget to promote my posts sometimes. I have things I want to try that I don’t get to or forget about. I have goals I set and don’t meet. But none of it changes anything.
I get that blogging has become an industry. And I’m thrilled that it’s a way some of us can monetize something we love. But I’m here for it whether that happens or not.
If you don’t get me, that’s fine. You don’t have to. I’m not saying my way is the right way. We all do this for our own reasons and in our own way. But I think there may be some people out there like me who are starting to feel like they should respond to the pressure to “be” whatever it is. And if that doesn’t feel right for you, I just want you to know that there’s nobody out there who says you have to play by a set of rules.
I have a small blog. I don’t care if it ever gets big. I am thrilled with it staying small. I write what I want and the funny thing is that my readers have become more involved when I am more true to myself. I’ve been able to make tons of blogging friends and get a day job or two out of it and learn things and teach them and be fairly well respected in my own small-time way. I thought for a while that I had to be popular and have huge numbers for those things to happen, but you don’t. And I want to make sure that someone who needs to know that can know it.
I love my blog. It is me. It makes me happy. It makes my life better. It makes me a more fulfilled human being. That there are other people who enjoy it and even care about it is still astonishing. That it has done something small for a few people is more than I’ve ever asked for. It is, frankly, the best. And I just can’t quit.